In less than 24 hours I will be headed to True North. I’ll be honest, I’m a little anxious. I had a “discussion” with one of my daughters the other day about my adventure. I felt like she was thinking that I was weak for not being able to heal myself on my own. Since other people are a reflection of our own thoughts and feelings, am I thinking that I’m weak for not being able to heal myself??? I guess, in a way, yes. I also know that the journey I’m embarking on takes strength. Strength to believe that my family will be ok without me for 3 weeks. Strength to take this time for myself. (Most moms that I know of have a really hard time with this!) Strength to allow myself to experience the journey without expectations or assumptions. Strength to be vulnerable and daring!
Speaking of vulnerability, I decided I was going to be as honest as I could be with this journey. In that light, I am starting out this journey at 206lbs (dr’s visit yesterday). Accomplishment: At my highest, when we moved to Texas, I was probably pushing 275. For the past few years I’ve been hovering between 210 and 215. On the paperwork for True North, I actually put 215 as my weight. I am pleasantly surprised I’ll be starting this adventure 9 pounds lighter! I’ll be posting a full length picture later this evening. This is the beginning of my adventure. One thing I should share, the actual weight number doesn’t matter to me. It’s a number… just like my age, 52. It’s a number. That’s all. I didn’t like how when I turned 50 the world seemed to become obsessed with that number. It’s a number. That’s all. My mom makes fun of my sister and I because we LOVE to celebrate our birthdays! Seriously, LOVE! We’ve talked about why we enjoy it so much and we’ve come up with various theories. I am always perplexed by people who get upset, anxious, whatever about a number. It’s a number. That’s all. What I’m concentrating on is living my life to the fullest and right now I’m having a hard time doing that because of the pain. That’s why I’m heading to True North. Not because of my weight, although that will be a “side-effect” of the stay, but because of being able to live the life I want to be able to live.
Thanks to my OUTSTANDING family, I have the financial and emotional backing I need to be able to take this journey. I invite you to take the journey with me as I write about my adventures!